32 Flavors And Then Some...

Thursday, July 28, 2005

People who have Influenced Me!

Music: "Hard to Say I'm Sorry" Chicago

So I started thinking today about what makes us who we are in this life. How people who have come in and out of our lives influence us and add to our personalities. I never really thought about it before I guess but who would I be if I didn't know the people that I know? I wonder if I would be different. This sparked my intrest today after I spoke to a little girl's Mom that I babysit for occasionally. I love this little girl. She is beautiful and I know that she admires me. When she see's me at school her whole face lights up and she just smiles her beautiful smile. I had to cancel my babysitting job for her last week on account of my bite and I felt terrible for doing so but I was not in good spirits that day. When I saw her Mom today she told me that Jessann cried her eyes out because I didn't come over that night. That she went to bed crying and saying how much she missed me and that to call me and tell me to come over because she was going to take care of me and make me all better. This made me feel like crap of course but then I realized how much I mean to this little 4yr old girl. I realized at that moment that everything I do or say influences this child and it scared me for a second. But then I thought, How wonderful, what a privledge to have this child's admiration. She want's to be an actress go figure and she could. She's gorgeous and has a magnetic personality and on top of that she is bossy. You have to be bossy to be an actress right? So who influenced me? Who brought a little something to my life to make me Brandi? Another friend of mine had something on her blog like this and I thought it was very inspiring. So here is the list of all the people that I can remember who have added to my life. This is going to be the longes post ever written!

MY MOM: I sometimes believe that she is a Nazi because she is forever telling me to be strong and blah blah blah but this woman has given me my determination because no matter how much I disagree with her decisions and why she chooses to stay in a situation that is unhealthy she always has the strength to keep going with her life. When I don't feel like doing something or just being lazy she is always in the back of my mind telling me to be responsible, independent,strong, keep going and I thank her for that because it has made me persevere through many a hardtime. Her ability to multitask is amazing. She had 5 children and a life that was not all peaches and cream and she tried her best to give me a happy childhood. I hope that one day the lines of communication between us will open up a little more and I see that she is trying so I can only be patient because I love her.

MY DAD: My Dad has a bad Irish temper and I really sometimes think that I don't like him but I realize that he is sometimes misunderstood. I have to thank my Dad for the dreamer in me because I know for sure that he is the one who passed on this famous trait of mine. Growing up he showed me all sorts of neat things and one of them was a respect for nature and history. He used to put us (my sis Liz) in the back of his old red Ford Truck (The red goose as we called her)and take us out into the country. We sat in that truck with our blond ponytails dressed in our Oshkoshbgosh overalls and ate boiled p-nuts and drank Coke a Cola just like two little Southern girls should. We would stop at old cemeteries, go fishing in ponds, skip stones in the lake, wade in streams, climb trees and just run around with boundless freedom. My Dad is forever trying to learn a new skill wether it be juggling, playing the harmonica, flying a plane, and I am the same way. He is very interested in our family history and he taught me how to research geneaology and learn about my roots. I have alot of my Dad's qualities and I am very thankful to him for that.

My NANA: She loved me unconditionally and taught me how to have Southern elegance and charm. With a voice as sweet as honey she would tell me how wonderful I was to her no matter how many F's I made in Math class or how many horrible outfits I wore in the early 90's. I kinda went through this whole punk rock phase. She always told me I would go far and believed in me 100%. I have to thank her for my love of jazz music, Hilton Head Is., ice cream sandwich's, Mcdonalds Chicken McNuggets, The Bombay Co., Integrity, Class, Charm and all things girlie.

MY PAPA: I don't really remember him much but one memory stands out the most. He had lung cancer and had a big oxygen tank that he had to drag around everywhere. When your 4yrs old it's kind of scary to see someone you love in this condition and not understand the seriousness of the illness. I remember sitting on the front porch with him with a lollipop in my mouth and he said Brandi you can do whatever you want to do in this life. Don't ever let anybody tell you different. He died a few days later but what a memory. I have to thank him for that because I always remember that bit of advice.

MY GRANNY: Oh where to begin with this woman. I have my Grandmothers heart no doubt. The silliest little thing would bring tears to her eyes. When I discovered I could carry a tune at the age of 10 I decided I wanted someone to critique me and tell me if I needed to just keep my mouth shut or continue to sing. I told my Granny I had a secret. I could sing. She said well let's hear it sister. I sang Somewhere over the Rainbow to her and when I was finished she had tears in her eyes and gave me a great big hug. That was just beautiful she said, beautiful. When I was going to community college back home I would stop by her house between classes and have lunch. She always had a hot plate ready for me when I walked through the door and we would talk and talk. She was so spiritual,loving, and nurturing but she knew when to cut your butt too. Of course I rarely got a whipping from my Granny. I was such a sweet angel I never really needed one :)

My GRANDADDY: Hey Bran Dandy! This is what he called me. My Grandad smoked like a Chimney. He woke at 4am everyday, read the newspaper,drank his coffee, and played Solitaire for about 2 hours, watched the news and John Wayne movies, tended to his garden and then would go from grocery store to grocery store to get the best deal. He bought in bulk and always brought home a treat for his granbabies. My Grandaddy had an 8th grade education, was orphaned at age 12 and joined the Navy at 17. He was on the Beaches of Normandy and saw everything. He worked for 50years at a Mercantile plant. If there is one thing I learned from him it's honor,dignity,pride,and the importance of my heritage.

MY AUNT DAlE: You never really know somebody no matter how close you are to them.

MY Brother and Sisters: That nothing beats having a big family. I will always have them in my life for love and support and it was so awesome back in the day to tell some kid at school that I would beat his ass if he bothered my sister again. I used to hate being the oldest but I have grown to love my status. I always get the front seat when I come home.

Jay: No this was not a good situation at all but if there is one thing that it taught me was independence. I grew a backbone from this and learned to take a stand for my life. It also taught me forgiveness and most importantly I became my own person, I broke the cycle. I also learned that sex was way overrated.

Tripp: My first french kiss at the old age of 15. Everyone else had already french kissed by the age of 9 in my generation. I was a late bloomer. He taught me how to french kiss and for that I am grateful.

John: Gave me my first broken heart at 16. He moved away for college. He was such a dork but I had such a crush on him. He played Soccer and I thought he was so cute. Oh well you win some you lose some.

Adam: I learned how naive I was from this boy. He professed his love for me many a time while he was screwing one of my best friends. I was still a virgin and had barely even kissed a boy. I thank him for that because I got smart real quick, at least I thought.

Mandy: Oh I love this girl. She brought out the wild child in me. I drank a whole bottle Boone's Farm Strawberry wine with this girl and got drunk off my ass. I was 17. Like I said, late bloomer. Smoked endless cigarettes in her pickup truck listening to Bone Thugs. I toilet papered and egged people's houses with this girl and just let loose. She taught me how to have fun and just be me.

To Be Continued...................

Friday, July 22, 2005

Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!

Hello boys and girls! So I was stung by a bee or some insect last weekend on my face again. If you will recall I was bitten by a spider on my face months ago and by the way my scar is healing nicely. So you would think I would learn not to scratch or pick at it but I did and caused myself misery. My face is swollen like a balloon and the only thing good about it is that I have Angelina Jolie lips! It kept getting worst and I kept ignoring it until last night at about midnight I looked in the mirror and saw that I had huge duck lips and stuff oozing out of my bite. Yuck! I went to the hospital and thank God they were not busy because I went in got an antibiotic and went straight home. It's started to heal now. Why do bugs love me? It's because my blood is so sweet they just have to get a taste. I just want to get on my feet again. I feel so unorganized b/c half of my stuff is at Missy's and the other half is in the ghetto. I need big strong men to help me move my furniture. I will admit defeat to the male sex on this one. I can't move furniture by myself. Maybe if I was Wonderwoman. I had a job interview this week for a place called MY Gym. It's a gym for children. It would be lots of fun and I hope I get it but that means staying in Charleston longer but who knows. I'm kind of in Gods hands at this point. I'm just going with the flow. I'm reading Maya Angelou's "I know Why the Caged Bird Sings" and it is so wonderful. You should read it if you ever get a chance. I finished my bio on Vivien Leigh. Very sad and tragic her life but what an actress. She was so dedicated to her work. So of course because of my bee issues filming was canceled and I feel so unprofessional but believe me. I don't think people want to see a film where the actress has things oozing out of her face and lips so big she can't articulate a thing. Well I'm peacin out. It sux that I'm home on a Friday night but my vanity will not let me (bee) seen in public!

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Not all dreams are made to last!!

Music: "Hands To Heaven" Breathe

How do you prevent falling in love? Is it possible? I tried for so long to not fall in love, guarded my heart, stayed a mystery but nevertheless it found me and broke my heart into. I swore to myself that I would never become a fool, be taken advantage of ever again after my first serious relationship. Love does funny things to the person infected. It makes you desperate, crazy, your ability to think logically dissapears and your pride is out the door. I mean obviously this is true because look at me. I'm writing all this in an online blog that thank God only my closest friends can read. Although I did guard my heart because I didn't want to be hurt again I was still vulnerable. I am one of the few people in the world who thinks with their heart rather than their head. Honesty about my feelings all out there on the table for the world to see. And where did it get me? Nowhere. I've read all the books from "He's just not that into you" or "Your'e just not that into him either" or even "Why men love Bitches" and as I find them all fairly ridiculous I tried with all I had to heed their expert advice. And here I am hopelessly laying it all out on the table because I am hopelessly in love. The experts in the books would tell me to keep it to myself but the more I grow in this life the more I realize that it's not in my nature when it comes to matters of the heart. So I made my last attempt at contacting the object of my affection a week ago only to speak to him in a 2 second conversation in which he preceeded to tell me he would call me later. Of course the phone call never happened and then in desperation I attempted one last time only to hear nothing. I made up all the excuses I could for him but at the end of the day I have to face the fact that "He's just not that into me". I thought making that phone call and having the courage to speak to him again would make Delilah proud but all it really did was make me feel like an idiot. So here I am with a bee sting on my lip (insects love me) and a screwdriver in my hand drowning in my sorrow. Well being the Scorpio that I am I always bounce back when being knocked down to my knees. I am very resilient. For the longest time I was ashamed that I couldn't get over this person. I tried all I could to pour my heart into something else or someone else and although it worked for awhile the daydreams of being with the only person I have ever truly cared for began to creep back into my mind. I guess if I'm going to be honest the pain that I have most endured is caring so much with nothing in return. Everyone wants that person in his of her life that gives you encouragement and approval and he was that person for me. I sent him the films that I am so proud to have been a part of to hear nothing in return from him, supported him in his artisitc pursuits only to be told that work was more important than having a drink with me and some of his closest friends after the show. So he sounds like a real asshole huh? But for some reason he meant the world to me. So what do I do now? Well I have to let go because honestly what more can I do? I have opened my heart and if that is not enough then I have to move on with my life and try to forget him. Move past the hope of something more ever happening between us. I knew I loved him when I daydreamed about what our kids would look like, future vacations to Disneyworld with our children, envisioning one another on stage while the other was out in the audience for support and last but not least every girls dream of walking on the beach barefoot dressed in white and looking at him smiling while we vow our love to one another and live happily ever after. I guess not all dreams are made to last and so having said that, Goodbye dream! It's time for me to find another.

Sunday, July 17, 2005

Can I buy Andy Milonakis?

I rock peas on my head but don't call me pea head
Bees on my head but don't call me a bee head
Bruce lees on my head but don't call me a lee head
Now please excuse me i gots to get my tree fed
You wear name brands, and i make my own clothing
I hang out with an apple who loves self-loathing
"I hate myself"
Pancake on my face, makes me extra happy
I like shampoo bottles that sit on my lappy
Cuz it my show you can't tell me what to do
When life hands me lemons i make beef stew
So yo i gotta go its time for me to rock it
I put bologna in my left pocket
Smear some cream cheese in my gold locket
Cuz its my show i'm Andy Milonakis
Its my show i'm Shmandy Shmiloshmakis
Its my Show i'm Andy Milonakis
-The Andy Milonakis Theme Song

I love this kid!! And he's not a kid. He was born in 1976. He is older than me but he looks like he is 15. When I become rich and famous I'm going to buy him so he can entertain me all day!

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Can't resist posting this

Quote from my friend Tiffany Hilton " Guys are like shoes: you gotta try them on and see if they fit. Sometimes they are perfect and sometimes they pinch your feet but most of the time they start out perfect but after awhile they fall apart. The good ones will last" SHE'S BRILLIANT! SHE NEEDS HER OWN ADVICE COLUMN!

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Baby Blues

Music: Deftones "Changes" ( I have a sexual fantasy about this song involving a tinkerbell costume. Don't ask)

I don't know why but I have alot to write. I feel like getting some stuff out there. By the way if you think I'm a big dork for doing this it's very therapeutic. Don't knock it till you try it. So Brandi has done yet another dumbass thing today. I go on my lunch break to pay my cable bill and there is an ass of traffic on the bridge. I finally get to Comcast pay my bill, get all the way back to work only to realize I wrote the check for the wrong amount. Total waste of a lunch break. I was driving over the Old Cooper River bridge and realized that it's probably one of the last times I will ever drive over it. That bridge scared the living daylights out of me when I first move to Charleston but now I love that bridge. It's going to be sad to see it go. My grandad bless his heart used to drive over the bridge in a big Studebaker with a mile long cigarette hanging out of his mouth and this is when cars were going both ways back and forth. My Dad told me that story. That new coldplay song came on as I was going across and it made me smile to myself. That is one of those songs that make you realize that life is pretty cool sometimes. I'm going through one of those days where I start to doubt things and I don't know why. Like is it worth it to move somewhere to continue giving a stab at acting. This has nothing to do with confidence and these doubts do go away but they resurface every now and again and today is one of them. I know that moving is something I need to do but the other night, I can't believe I'm saying this, I was babysitting these 3 kids. One of them is 10 weeks old. A little baby and I couldn't tear myself away from her. I just held her and kept thinking I could have one of these little boogers. She was just so sweet and angelic and I thought this is what life is about. Love. Then I had to walk in the other room to change her and I looked in the mirror at myself holding this little person and it freaked me out. It was like okay so this is what I would look like with a baby. I know I definitely want kids but not at this point in my life. In a few years no doubt. Oh and then there is that whole problem with needing a man in the equation. Screw Men! I 'll just adopt but I would like to have one of my own too. And then there is that whole crazy world situation. The world is so precarious and I don't know if I want my kids to grow up in chaos. I'm sure my parents thought the very same thing back in 1978 though. So it's when I start to think of family that I start to doubt the acting thing but like I said this feeling goes away. This is obviously not where I am in my life right now but will be someday in the near future. I still need more me time right now. I haven't gotten myself completely figured out and I don't know if I ever will but I'm trying. As much as I want to be this hot actress who never grows old and wins Oscars and is career oriented there is that nurturing instinct inside of me that just wants to care about something besides my damn self. So anyways I just spilled my guts so I'm out like a fat kid in a game of Dodgeball. Oh and if you haven't seen the Andy Milonakis show yet you must see it! I love that show. It's my kind of humor. The dog is so cute.

Saturday, July 09, 2005

Walking in Bridget Jones Shoes

Music: The sound of the rain pouring outside. I just love Hurricane season.

So another week gone by and I'm sitting here stuck inside because of the rain. It's kinda nice though but I'm very restless. I was craving french onion soup so I went to Atlanta Bread and it's flooding outside to get some and to also get a coffee. That is totally wrong grammar and the structure of that last sentence is all wrong but I don't care. I write the thoughts as they come. Embarrassing moment #2 happened at Atlanta Bread. I go inside drenched order my food finally get it and as I'm leaving I try to put on my coat over my head and carry my coffee and my bag of soup. Well leave it to me. I held the coffee a little to tight and the top came off and coffee splashed all over me and that shit was hot too. Then I get myself together and try to walk out the door when lo and behold I drop my keys on the floor. I bend down to get them and I do the same damn thing with the coffee again. How clumsy can I possibly be? Oh and this is not all of my embarrassment this week. Friday I had the day off because we were'nt filming this weekend and I decided to go to the beach. I'm laying there on my towel soaking up the rays and getting extremely hot and sweaty so I decided to go take a dip in the ocean. Well sitting beside me are about 5 really hot guys. They are all cut and tan and they are all surfers. So I go out in the waves, go underwater, I'm having a good old time when BAM! this huge wave knocks me over, underwater for what felt like 10 minutes, and completely knocks the breath out of me. I stand up get myself together and then notice my boob is hanging out of my top. The hot guys are laughing at me. I go get my stuff with whatever dignity I have left and leave. OH MY GOD! I totally understand where Bridget Jones was coming from.
I have decided to move most definitely. My heart is set on New York and New Orleans is still a possiblity but for now I'm planning on the big apple. I'm going at the end of August for a week to look for a job and a place to live and then I'm going to move shortly thereafter depending on the outcome of my visit. I've got to get a second job so that hunt will start Monday. I'm moving out of the ghetto. Yes ladies and gentlemen you heard right. I'm moving on up to the Westside. I'm moving in with Missy. I'm already basically living here now just have to get my stuff over here. It will help me save up and she's practically married now so she won't be here a whole lot. I guess I'm kinda watching the place for her. I will be filming next weekend and I can't wait. I want to go to the drag show again. It was so much fun to watch. They are more feminine than I am I think. I don't really have much else to report. One thing did happen to me Friday though that sent a little pang of joy to my heart. I was sitting in my car in a parking lot eating my grilled chicken sandwich when a little boy and his mom walked in front of the car. The little boy saw me, he must have been about 7, stopped,smiled and waved at me. It was the coolest thing, it was like he knew me or something. Well speaking of children I have to go babysit now. I'm hanging out with Connie afterwards if it's not pouring. I'm so busy I never get to spend time with my friends anymore and I miss her. Until next weekend this is Brandi Keyton Boone......Good Day!

Saturday, July 02, 2005

That which doesn't kill me only makes me stronger!

Music: Broken Social Scene "Looks just like the Sun"

I just finished filming about an hour ago. I have found love at last. I love what I am doing and I can't imagine doing anything else now, ever. This is my focus. I have to do this for the rest of my life and from this point on all I am doing is focusing on making this into a full blown career. I have really impressed myself the last few months with my strength, my will power, my ability to pull through anything. Things that used to really embarrass me are hillarious to me now. For example while we were filming today I had a litte to much coffee and if you know me very well you know that I pee like a million times a day. Well I had to poo so I did and then the toilet wouldn't flush because there was no water in the tank. I know it seems like I talk about poo all the time. I knew we were going to be filming the shower scene in there so I did'nt want it to stink or somebody to open the lid. I went and asked one of the P.A's to help me out so she filled up this big trash can with water and I had to go dump it in the tank to make it flush meanwhile the director is sitting there wondering what the hell is taking me so long. Talk about being embarrassed! I just laughed it off. I also got pulled over by a cop on the way to Augusta for speeding in my RED car and he gave me 4 tickets. One for no registration,proof of insurance,improper display of tags,and then speeding. I was going 70 in a 60. I have to go to court on the 14th. Hopefully it will be dismissed if I show proof of everything. So anyway things are good and I'm happy at this moment. I'm ready to go enjoy my 4th of July!!!! I would like to leave you with a few words to my new theme song. For anyone who has ever caused me Pain! I want to Thank You!


After all you put me through
You'd think I'd dispise you
But in the end I wanna thank you
'Cause you made that much stronger

Well I thought I knew you, thinking that you were true
Guess I, I couldn't trust called your bluff, time is up
'cause I've Had enough
You were there by my side, always down for the ride
But your joy ride just came down in flames
'Cause your greed sold me out in shame, mmhmm

After all of the stealing and cheating
You probably think that I hold resentment for you
But uh uh, oh no, you're wrong
'Cause if it wasn't for all that you tried to do,
I wouldn't know just how capable I am to pull through
So I wanna say thank you
'cause it

Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter



Never saw it coming,
All of your backstabbing
Just so, you could cash in
On a good thing before I'd realized your game
I heard you're going round
Playin' the victim now
But don't even begin
Feeling I'm the one to blame
'Cause you dug your own grave

After all of the fights and the lies
Yes your wanting to HURT me
But that won't work anymore, no more, uh uh, it's over
'Cause if it wasn't for all of your torture
I wouldn't know how to be this way now and never back down
So I wanna say thank you
'cause it

Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter

How could this man I thought I know
Turn out to be unjust so cruel
Could only see the good in you
Pretended not to see the truth
You tried to hide your lies, disguise yourself
Through living in denial
But in the end you'll see
YOU WON'T STOP ME

I am a fighter and I (fighter and I)
I ain't gon stop (I ain't gon stop)
There is no turning back
I'VE HAD ENOUGH

Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter

Thought I would forget but I
I remember
Yes, I remember
I'll remember

Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter